Sunday, June 29, 2008

"Coloring Inside the Lines"


She sat at the table with the crayon clinched tightly between her fist. She colored the printed flower with great vigor. The flower was green, the stem was yellow, and the entire page was covered with red crayon and ballpoint pen marks. She did not stay “inside the lines”. She wanted to share her picture with us. She loudly asked us if we thought it was pretty? We bragged on her artistic talent. “Addi or Hannah?,” you might ask. No. This struggling artist was my mother-in-law who is not 3, but 79.
She told us that she thought if she would show them (referring to the hospital staff, I am certain) that she could “do something” then maybe she could leave. She was trying hard to “color inside the lines”. Sadly, mental illness has no lines. Break a leg- you can see the cast; cancer- you see the bald head or the ravages of chemotherapy; car accident- the bruises, stitches, and marks are visible; mental illness- surely you can “think yourself” out of this “imagined illness”. Not so. I remember in vivid detail an incident in my life where I did not “color inside the lines.” I was in second grade. Mrs. Jefferson was my teacher. I was, for the most part, the student that teachers loved to have. I always “colored inside the lines”. On this particular day, a day in October, we were coloring our color page from the Weekly Reader. The picture was of a scary cat sitting on a fence, with pumpkins all about. Remember, this was in a day and age when no one worried about the celebration of Halloween being offensive to anyone. There were directions as to what color everything should be. For some reason, on that particular October day, I did not want my pumpkins to be orange, and for the moon to be yellow, and for all of life to follow the directions at the bottom of the page. I wanted it all to be black. I can still remember the look of “disgust” on Mrs. Jefferson’s face. I thought her blue hair was going to turn red! I also remember that she wrote on my paper that I did not follow directions, and that I colored outside of the lines. I felt ashamed and humiliated, much as I think my dear, sweet, refined mother-in-law would, if her “thinking” were right. A broken arm heals, many people are cancer survivors, car accident victims often recover, but mental illness…our brains remain with us, and the wiring, which I feel arrives with us at birth, can seldom be “re-wired”. Treatments that once worked, or at least gave some temporary relief, can no longer be used because of age and health issues. The doctor openly admits that he does not know what to do. So, here we are at this point, praying for a reprieve, for a better day, for relief, just praying that someone can help, that someone can help her to get to the point where more of the colors are inside the lines. I am so thankful for our support system. For those who always ask, and for those who care. I am thankful for my husband and for my brother-in-law, who, like the doctors, don’t know what to do, but are willing to do whatever is needed. Remember Betty Courington in your prayers. There has never been a better Christian woman, and to have to see her as she is at the present is heartbreaking.

Thursday, June 26, 2008

Thursday Tid-bits

Edit to this post- I lost 6.8 at tonight's weigh-in. Now remember, I have missed 3 weeks, but that still is pretty good considering that I have had 3 weeks of food, food, and more food! That makes my total 68.2!
I love summer. Today I slept until after 8! I used to be able to sleep until noon, but age has caught up with me. David and I had some errands to run, so he went with me. We had to get a new hose for the automatic pool cleaner, and we ran to Aldi. David has gone to the hospital to see his mother, and I am fixing to go to Weight Watchers. I have missed the last 3 weeks because of VBS, Destin, and Camp. I understand that the leader has given up this group, so I may switch to Monday's and go where she is, which is just in Hueytown. I will give an update later, but I am hoping that their scales and my scales are in unison. I made a big committment yesterday- I gave away clothes. I gave away a LOT of clothes. It is scary. Clothes are expensive- even when you buy them cheap, like I do. My closet is getting pretty narrowed down, compared to usual. That is okay. I keep saying it- I pray that this time is the charm. I pray that I can continue to lose and that I can keep it off. Everyone has been so complimentary and encouraging, but in reality, it is up to me. Well, I guess this is another weight blog!
I am missing Paul, Kim, Addi, Levi, and Lila. I am used to them being around. I have talked to them and they are having a great trip. They have had a busy summer and it is not over. I talked to Mandi last night. She is so sweet. She called just to call, and that was nice. Josh, Katie, and Hannah came over on Tuesday night. Hannah is great entertainment. Josh told us today that he ran over his toe with a big, heavy, metal, laundry thingy. He said his toe is purple. I wonder if it is broken? While we were in Destin I dropped the shampoo on my foot and it bruised really bad. I thought I might have broken something, but I don't guess I did.
What a boring blog post- but at least I am current!!!!

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

This and That

Hi All- it is Tuesday night in Maytown and all is well. I have just returned from taking Mary to the doctor. She had to have an endoscopy- they were checking her esophagus for damage. The doctor said she had very minimal damage, and that was good. They also discovered 4 small stomach ulcers, and put her on medicine. She will see the transplant doctor next week. The gastro doctor did not know what her transplant status was, but he hoped that they could get her moved up even higher on the list.
We had a great week at camp, but I am glad to be home. Working the kitchen is not easy, but it is rewarding.
My UWA classes are going well. 2 of my classes had assignments due yesterday, so I had a lot of grading to do. I still have a few "non-believers" who have yet to submit their assignments.
David has now lost almost 54 pounds, and I have lost almost 64. Together we have lost a person. Sad, isn't it? I am discarding clothes left and right. It's funny- for about the first 50 pounds I had some clothes that I could keep on wearing- then after the 50 pound mark, things began to get big. I have enjoyed shopping, but I am not going over-board because I hope what I have now will soon be too big.
I hope everyone is having a great week!

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Tagged by Katie
The jest of it ~ This idea came from the book by Larry Smith and Rachel Fershleiser called Not Quite What I Was Planning: Six Word Memoirs by Writers Famous and Obscure. The book is a compilation that is based on the story that Hemingway once bet ten dollars that he could sum up his entire life in just six words. His words? For Sale: baby shoes, never worn.Here are the rules:1. Write your own six word memoir.2. Post it on your blog and include a visual illustration if you’d like.3. Link to the person that tagged you in your post and to this original post if possible so we can track it as it travels across the blogosphere.4. Tag five more blogs with links.5. And don’t forget to leave a comment on the tagged blogs with an invitation to play!

Make a difference, while you can.

Life here is so temporary. If we live to be 100, that will be short at best. So, we all need to make a difference while we can. Sometimes it is just the little things that matter. No kindness. no matter how small, usually goes unnoticed.
I tag-
Phyllis
Lynn
Pam
Emily
Mary
Have a great day and believe it or not, I am posting from ICYC- the greatest place on earth, where I hope I am making a difference!

Friday, June 13, 2008

In Memory of Mother

Velma Grubbs Melton
February 16, 1912- June 15, 1998
10 Years
You can only have one mother, patient, kind and true;
No other friend in all the world, Will be the same to you.
When other friends forsake you,To mother you will return,
For all her loving kindness, She asks nothing in return.
As we look upon her picture, Sweet memories we recall,
Of a face so full of sunshine, And a smile for one and all.
Sweet Jesus, take this message, To our dear mother up above;
Tell her how we miss her, And give her all our love.
Since I will be at camp on Sunday, I wanted to make this post while I had time. While I know that these are just words, I always find that by posting a poem it makes me think of Mother. Can it be that it has been 10 years since I last held her hand, had a conversation with her, shared family news, discussed what was happening in the world? I still miss my mother every day of my life. I remember that Mother expressed to me how she still missed her mother, and she had been dead for 3o years at that time. I know now how that feels. It is an emptiness and a longing. I am so thankful that I had a Mother who loved and cared for me. What a blessing. While 10 years at times seems so short, it seems it has been forever since I have heard Mother's voice. I can close my eyes and be right back at her bedside, watching her breathe her last breath, but when I try to hear her voice, it seems so distant. I often try to hear it in my mind, but it is hard. Ten years- so short and yet so long. Mother, I love you.

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Sleeping Beauty


By the sea, by the sea, by the beautiful sea!

Well, believe it or not, I had a post ready to go and hit a button and deleted the whole thing- so here I go again.
We are having a great time in Destin. My conference is good, and I am done by early afternoon. Tomorrow I will be done before noon. David is enjoying himself (see his blog), and is out deep-sea fishing at the moment. He is with some of my co-workers, and former co-workers. Hopefully they will be kind to him!
I have been shopping. I went to Burkes (it is Beale's here) and bought a pair of denim capris and a 65 cent pair of jeans. I then went to Ross and bought a new skirt, a top, and a pair of black capris. I am in pretty good shape now with a few new things that fit. I am going to put something in writing that is out of my character- I bought size 20's! I have not worn a 20 in forever. Now for my skinny readers, this sounds huge, I know, but to me, a recovering size 26-28, it seemed unreal! I can't believe I just put my clothes size in print!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I better hurry and post before I decide against it. Seriously, I have done fairly well this week. There have been food challenges, but I have managed. I have not been perfect, but I have not been bad. Food issues are so complex. I pray I can keep this weight off, this time. Been there, done that so many times. I have so much to live for, and while I still have good health I need to conquer this addiction. Next week, working in the kitchen at camp, will be a bigger obstacle. I seriously hope to maintain and not gain. Then I will have a few weeks before our family vacation to try to drop a few more pounds.
Well, enough of that. I have to go pick David up in a little while. I hope he has some fish!!

Sunday, June 08, 2008

Happy Sunday Morning, to All!

Well, it is Sunday morning, and VBS 2008 is now history. I can't believe how weeks come and go. We had a good VBS although our attendance was down some from last year. We have been hit hard by moves in the past year. While we seem to be holding our own, we can't seem to get "ahead". We lose one family of 4 and we get one- that seems to be the story. Speaking of losing,this morning will be our first morning without Daryl, Becky, and Emily. I am not certain about Rachel- I think she is going to try to keep coming for a while at least- but it is a drive for her and she will be by herself, so I don't know if she will keep it up or not. She said she would see how it went. I am sad thinking about them being gone. They will, of course, continue to be a part of our lives, but reality is, it will not be the same. Daryl came by yesterday to bring my new glasses, and he was exhausted- moving is not easy.
This week will find us in sunny Destin, Florida for my annual Nuts and Bolts Symposium for Middle Level Education. This is the third year that I have attended and it is a great program. What is really great is that it is basically a morning program and you are done by early afternoon. Then the rest of the day is yours, and there is great shopping, eating, fishing, beach, etc! We have stayed in the same condo for the past 2 years and we will be in the same one this time. It is soooooo nice and it is beginning to feel real familiar. David gets to come along for the ride, and we have a great time. We are excited.
Yesterday was a banner day at my house- I saw the bottom of the laundry hamper. I mean the TOTAL bottom, with nothing in it. At one point everything in this house was clean. Sadly, at this point one day later, I could do another load!
Our camera came and we are in total love. I am going to post some photos later. I will try to post some from Destin.
Well, I need to move on. We are having some reshuffling on Sunday School classes and I may have to "pinch-hit" this morning. Daryl and Becky both taught on Sunday morning and we have had to find teachers to take their place. David is moving to the teenage class on Sunday morning- something he has missed terribly. He loves teaching the teens.
Have a great week- and pray for us as we travel. There are a lot of crazy drivers out there, talking on cell phones, and playing with their CD players, etc., so everyone be careful.

Wednesday, June 04, 2008

Having fun in the summer sun!

What a great day- I did not have to go anywhere! I spent about an hour floating in the pool and would have stayed longer had I not been bit on my hind side by some type of stinging insect. It may have been a wasp or a horsefly- it left a pretty bad mark, whatever it was. Anyway, that did not ruin my joy at having nothing pressing to do.
Sunday was a wonderful day. We were honored by the congregation for our 30 years at Sylvan Springs. Daniel and Mandi were here, so all of our kids were present. Paul, Daniel, and Josh all spoke. I think Paul and Daniel had their speeches written, so I may get them and post them. Josh spoke from "the cuff" and of course, there was not a dry eye. I found out on Saturday, in an effort to keep David out of the building. He had not a clue. We were presented a beautiful outdoor lamppost. I am excited about having it installed. Thanks to everyone-I know it was a lot of hard work.
We are in the midst of VBS. What fun. The kids are all having such a great time, and the adults are too.
David and I took MaMa to Jasper yesterday and had her an upper denture made and we all had our eyes checked and got new glasses ordered. David and I picked out some frames that we were told made us look "younger". That should be interesting!
Addi finished her ball season. We now look forward to soccer. I believe Levi might be playing, so that should be fun. In sad news, one of the ballpark children drowned this past Saturday at one of the end of the year team parties. He would have been starting first grade. We have known this family since Kim was Addi's age. The little boy's aunt and uncle were part of Addi's coaching staff this season, and Kim played ball with the aunt. The grandmother actually helped coach and All-Star team that Kim was on and David was the head coach. It has been a sad event.
My summer classes at UWA officially begin next Monday. I already have a full roster in 2 of the classes, and my internship class has 16 on roll. I imagine there will be a few more to register between now and Monday. Woo Hoo- nice check!!!
I better go- I am cooking supper- baked chicken, green beans, low-calorie squash dish, and WW cornbread. The joy of being home- a great meal.
Oh yes- I am excited!!!! We have ordered a new camera. We have had a couple of little digital cameras that I have tolerated, but I wanted a good camera. Some of the photos that people post on their blogs are so great and I wanted to "compete", so we bit the bullet and bought what we hope will fit the bill.
Have a great day!